Not many people know this about me but I suffer with anxiety and various other mental health issues. It's not something I have felt particularly comfortable in expressing publicly in detail, ever. Close friends know but that's about it. I have suffered with various things since a young age but I didn't really know what it all was until two years ago. I didn't realise that other people didn't experience these things to the extent that I do.
I have suffered with various forms of anxiety and mental health problems since childhood; separation anxiety, co-dependence, relationship anxiety, self-esteem issues, trust issues, chronic stress and bouts of depression. I have always had counselling on and off in my worst patches.
Two years ago was a really, really bad time for me. It was crippling. My life felt like it was falling apart. But two years on and I've learnt to cope. I've delved deep into who I am to find out why my mind behaves in this way. I am now on good terms with my mind but know that it can turn against me at any point so daily self care is essential. Today I woke up feeling good. I said something positive straight away and I heard the surprise in my boyfriend's voice. Change is possible. I am proof. For anyone suffering, never think that that is how you will always feel. Everything is temporary, even thought and feelings. Remember this when it feels all consuming. It can and will pass.